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Foolonga, Day Five
Shawn Fanning no longer allowed to share the island

By Todd Etter (TMF Knave)
September 12, 2000

In a rain-soaked Jester Council last night, Napster founder Shawn Fanning's torch was finally extinguished. His fellow castaways decided that they'd had enough of the 19-year-old entrepreneur and voted him off Foolonga, making him the fourth castaway in as many days to leave the remote island.

When asked if he was disappointed about his removal, Fanning replied, "Are you kidding me? I got to spend a week away from my parents on a scenic beach. Totally killer, dude. And I overheard some great conversations, so I'm taking with me some awesome business ideas. I'm glad nobody brought a non-disclosure agreement as their luxury item!" chuckled the teenager.

Of the remaining castaways, nobody was happier to see Fanning depart than Richard Branson, whose Virgin Records division has been hurt by the existence of Napster and other MP3-trading services. As Fanning was leaving the island, Branson stood up and shouted, "Download this, Shawn!"

Anna Kournikova, also 19 years old, was slightly sorry to see Fanning leave. "He was kinda cute, I guess. But his debt-to-income ratio is far too high for someone like myself. He should really leverage his available capital and liquidate his remaining equity. If he did that, I'd get funky with him," said Kournikova.

The other castaways didn't really offer up much reaction to Fanning's departure. When asked if he was sorry to see Fanning lose last night's vote, Peter Lynch said, "Who?" After Fanning was described to Lynch, the former Magellan manager said, "Oh... the guy in the cap? I thought he was part of the camera crew."

As the sun rose over the cliffs that flank the northeastern end of the island, only six castaways remained. And with an even number of six castaways left, it was time for another reward challenge, a competition in which the individuals divide into two teams and compete for additional luxury items. Today's winning team got to make one phone call to the person of their choice.

In contrast to the relay race of two days ago, today's event was financially related. The two teams were given a fictitious company's financial data and had to calculate five numbers: the P/E ratio, the YPEG, the current ratio, the company's market capitalization, and the profit margin. The one catch was that each member of the team had to derive one figure on his/her own. The team with the highest score would win.

After the gun was sounded, Team Trinculo (Whitman, Kournikova, Branson) and Team Feste (Lynch, Maria Bartiromo, Raven the Chimp) each began frantically poring over the financial statements.

Whitman and Branson decided to tackle four of the five numbers, and give the P/E ratio to Kournikova, since she explicitly defines that term in her popular Charles Schwab commercial. On the other side, Lynch and Bartiromo begrudgingly allowed Raven to calculate the market capitalization.

When the teams had finished, each had scored four out of five correct. Upon hearing the news, Whitman shouted, "Anna! I can't believe you screwed yours up, you stupid Russian!" But Anna's figure was correct. It was Whitman's market cap that was wrong. "Oh my goodness... I forgot to carry the two!" realized a sobbing Whitman.

On the other side, Lynch and Bartiromo correctly calculated both of their figures, while unsurprisingly, Raven's number was incorrect. The chimp's crumpled answer sheet consisted of smeared banana, some dead bugs, and a matted clump of black hair.

To break the tie, whichever incorrect answer was closer to the actual answer would determine the victor. Whitman's carrying error led to her being off by a factor of 10, and resulted in her incorrect answer of $40 billion. On the other hand, Raven's answer (which was determined to be $0 million), was actually closer to the correct amount of $4 billion. Victory to Team Feste.

"I know I wasn't very nice to Raven earlier, but to beat Meg Whitman, wow! I'm impressed," said Lynch. "When I get back, I'm considering hiring him to run our floundering Emerging Markets fund."

As promised, the three winners got one phone call to anyone in the world. Bartiromo called her family, Lynch called an automated quote service, and Raven sniffed the phone, rubbed it under his arm, and then buried it in a pile of mud.

Fast-forward to later that night.

It's time for you to vote another castaway off the island. Click on the button below and you'll be taken to the voting page. Voting is open from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. ET. If you visit us after that time, you can still view the voting results by clicking on the button.

If you'd like to see the order in which people are being voted off, check out the Contest Status page. Be sure to checkout previous reports and join the conversation on the Fool Survivor discussion board, too.


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