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Unfair Finances for the Unwed

Unmarried couples have to contend with more than forced smiles and lousy Christmas gifts from tsk-tsk-ing relatives. Without a ring and a framed marriage certificate over the mantel, the financial rights of the unwed are tenuous at best. Unhitched lovebirds face:

  • Less access to insurance price breaks, although this is improving. Depending on which statistics you believe, anywhere from 25% to 90% of employers offer domestic-partner benefits.
  • More complicated legal rights. Inheritance and retirement benefits, as well as medical decisions, are not automatically granted to life partners, as they are to married life partners.
  • No right to alimony if the couple splits.
  • Bigger tax burdens. Uncle Sam considers unwed cohabitating couples single in terms of income taxes. They pay the piper on their own salary, in addition to paying taxes on the value of perks offered by an employer.

Still, unwed couples are making inroads in some areas. Consider these progressive policies:

  • "Family" memberships at Motley Fool Stock Advisor pick Costco (Nasdaq: COST  ) , AAA, and the local YMCA. (Platonic roommates can find some money-saving workarounds, too.)
  • Continued access to pension and health insurance for senior citizens.
  • Perks that were previously off limits to domestic partners -- health, disability, and life insurance; pension benefits; family leave; and mental-health counseling. See what your state offers by visiting the Human Rights Campaign Foundation website.
  • Price breaks at rental car businesses.
  • A break on homeowners and car insurance from some insurance companies, such as State Farm and Allstate.
  • A live, live-in dishwasher with an already established personal CD collection!

Making it official
The one thing that unwed unions have in common with official married ones is what makes them last. Communication and contingency planning -- although far from romantic -- are the keys to a happy financial coupling.

Even though many of the same estate-planning and medical-directive rights are available to unmarried couples, the difference is that they don't happen automatically. You've got to fill out the paperwork to make your wishes recognized in the eyes of the law. It doesn't take much to put a few safeguards in place, and you can go on, skipping through life, with that smile your sweetie loves so much.

First, complete these important documents:

  • Your will (last will and testament) -- You can get this from an attorney, or you can opt for pre-printed, fill-in-the-blank forms -- but make sure they're up to date, and conform to the laws of your state.
  • A living will (advance medical directive) -- Available free at virtually every hospital in the nation.
  • A durable and medical power of attorney (health-care proxy) -- See a lawyer for this.

As you're filling out the paperwork, make your heirs apparent. Update all of your beneficiary information -- everything from your 401(k), 403(b), pension, profit-sharing, IRAs, and insurance policies to your coveted bicentennial quarter collection. If children are part of the union (as they are in one of every three unmarried households), these protections are that much more important. Lawyers recommend that unmarried couples sign an "acknowledgment of parenthood" or a paternity statement for additional legal protection, in the case of one parent's death or a breakup.

Other ownership issues arise when you make big purchases together, such as homes and cars. Discuss whether they will be jointly or individually owned and titled. And don't forget to let important people know where you keep your documents. There's only one thing worse than filling out a dead guy's tax forms, and that's doing it without access to his financial records.

If you're considering shacking up, or you already do so on an informal basis, there are a lot of joint decisions to be made outside of whose couch you're going to keep. Consider some key money questions and start talking -- together. Try the Fooly-Wed Game -- our take on the old Newlywed Game.

With more and more perks available to the unwed, now's a great time to have a heart-to-heart about money in your relationship.

More bedtime reading for twosomes:

Costco is aMotley Fool Stock Advisorpick. For a 30-day free trial, clickhere.

Dayana Yochim is the author ofCouples & Cash: How to Handle Money with your Honey.

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