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Dueling Fools

• Dueling Fools Intro
• Bull's Pen
• Bear's Den
• Bull's Rebuttal
• Bear's Rebuttal
• Vote!
• eMeringue Quote

• eMeringue Message Board

• Format for Printing
• Email to a Friend

Related Items

• Reader Responses
April Fools Revealed!
• Statement from the Brothers
• Hourly Updates
• Press Release
• CEO Interview
• Buy the eMeringue book
• eMeringue.com


Dueling Fools

eMeringue Bear's Rebuttal
by Zack Murrinir (TMF IBleed)

What is Rick talking about? First off, my name is Zack, not Mack. And the story about his mother made me misty-eyed and all, but I wouldn't go long on Old Yeller. And, that's right, I guess what I'm saying is that eMeringue is a dog.

Maybe it's me, but I would lose all credence in someone who considers McCloskey "Willy Wonka incarnate." What has McCloskey done to deserve such high praise? He inherited a chicken farm, got ax-squeamish, and forked over $70 for the right to use eMeringue.com for two years. Wow, I'm off to buy an odd lot at the market right now.

That last sentence was sarcasm. I have to point that out because neck deep in this Internet craze some jokes are being taken way too seriously. I mean, even my counterFool admits that eMeringue's financials are in shambles. He talks about distant competition but what about changing consumer tastes? Wake up! There is no guarantee that our fickle palette will still love the tasty texture of meringue come tomorrow.

Moreover, even if we never cease our fascination with the sweet stuff, do you really think eMeringue will corner the market the way Rick implies? If an upstart comes along and promises delivery in just six days, not seven -- boom! If a more creative player comes around and offers green meringue for St. Patrick's Day or customized plastic kiddie pools delivered rim-high in meringue -- boom! The patent office will always have room for yet another mousetrap -- and the next eMeringue.

So let's grab eMeringue by the collar and enroll it in a canine obedience school. Roll over. Play dead. Oops, it's not playing.

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