Post of the Day
January 22, 1998

From our Iomega Board


Subject: Tea leaves, Squiggles & Ominous Portents...
Author: Bsutton2

TA has always seemed to me like another of those late 20th century yearnings for the "Silver Sieve" that will explain away complexity, reduce the unknowable to a harmless sound byte, and -- on top of it all -- make some acquisitive gundygut a major killing. (You know: "Get your money for nothing and chicks for free...") It's Alchemy, redux. You'd think if we could micro-tune the future based upon careful analysis of a series of past events, we'd dispense first with war, hunger, disease and discomfort, and thereby make wealth irrelevant.

But let's say this stuff works as advertised and some TA genius puts it to the ignoble uses they recommend here...

Heck, in the very first week that our mathematical Midas could do so, he'd compound his wealth so far beyond fascination that Greed would bore him. With such extraordinary predictive powers at his disposal, he'd quickly find it puny to worry about whether his shares in Amalgamated Chickenshack were going north, south or merely sideways. He'd buy a book on Derivatives trading and roll for some real dough.

In the second week of his reign, he'd own an outright corner on any markets that had attracted him and they would cease to operate efficiently. Even if he were particularly obtuse, without that frisson of risk, by Thursday afternoon Power itself would bore him. This would not be a good thing: he'd stop wearing ties and drop his subscription to IBD.

On the third day of the following week, little more than a fortnight after perfecting Technical Analysis (and after having exhausted all possibilities of Onanism), our despairing Midas would leak the secrets of his wealth and power to whichever female as had resisted his charms thus far. Not the dummy he'd taken her for, she would immediately spot a Rising Pennant Formation in the shares of MicroDweeb International, convert her 401K into a closetfull of Prada handbags, and, thus satieated, set about correcting everyone else's shortcomings. Life as we know it would pretty much end right there.

That none of this has happened is incontrovertible proof that TA is bunk.

Bob Sutton


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