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Top 10 Things We Might Hear at Apple's iPhone Press Conference

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In an unprecedented move, Apple (Nasdaq: AAPL  ) is holding a press conference tomorrow to address criticism about one of its products.

After a smashingly successful launch, reports began to circulate that the signal on the iPhone 4 could drop if the phone were held a certain way. Apple played down the reports, suggesting the problem may be a software issue that incorrectly states fewer bars. However, lawsuits have still been flying at Apple, and exclusive carrier AT&T (NYSE: T  ) , as more evidence shows there's more at play here than a simple software flaw.

Testing by Consumer Reports confirmed hardware issues, however, and we now know that covering the antenna gap on the left side of the phone can cause a significant deterioration of the signal. As I've said before, this short-term blip won't make a difference in Apple's smartphone battles with Google (Nasdaq: GOOG  ) , Research In Motion (Nasdaq: RIMM  ) , and Nokia (NYSE: NOK  ) . The iPhone will continue to sell well and gain market share.

Still, we're waiting for Apple's announcement with great anticipation. Will there be a recall? (Unlikely.) Free bumper cases for everyone? (Possible.) Another lecture from Jobs on how to hold a phone? (He wouldn't, would he?)

After polling several of my co-workers here at Fool HQ, I've assembled a list of some of the things we might hear tomorrow.

Top 10 Things We Might Hear at Apple's iPhone Press Conference
10. "We'd like to introduce you to our new Chief Complaints Officer: Mel Gibson!"
9. "After extensive testing, we've determined this is nothing more than a Y2K bug."
8. "To avoid unjust media persecution, Apple is inviting all iPhone 4 users to join The Leader for a conference in Jobstown."
7. "You're also holding our iPad wrong, by the way."
6. "We've decided to backdate the iPhone 4 to before the problem appeared."
5. "We've bought out all duct tape manufacturers."
4. "Now we know how Microsoft feels!"
3. "Our solution? Free straps to bind your left arm, so that you must hold the iPhone 4 right-handed."
2. "By discouraging you from calling, we're trying to protect you from the radiation you'd otherwise be pumping directly into
your skull via our antenna."
1. "Go ahead. Stop using it. We dare you. What else are you going to do at Starbucks? Read? Talk to a girl?"

The Steve Jobs Betrayal
You may already know that in the final year of his life, Jobs revealed a stunning betrayal — and told his biographer, "I will spend my last dying breath... and every penny of Apple's $40 billion in the bank to right this wrong." What was it that made Jobs so irate — and why could it make a few in-the-know investors some major profits over the coming months and years?

Enter your email address below to find out what made Jobs so enraged!

Fool analyst Rex Moore was glad to finally see a National League All-Star win. Of the companies mentioned in this article, he owns shares of Microsoft. Nokia and Microsoft are Motley Fool Inside Value selections. Google is a Motley Fool Rule Breakers recommendation. Apple and Starbucks are Motley Fool Stock Advisor picks. The Fool owns shares of Google. Motley Fool Options has recommended a diagonal call position on Microsoft. Try any of our Foolish newsletters today, free for 30 days. The Motley Fool has a disclosure policy.


Comments from our Foolish Readers

Help us keep this a respectfully Foolish area! This is a place for our readers to discuss, debate, and learn more about the Foolish investing topic you read about above. Help us keep it clean and safe. If you believe a comment is abusive or otherwise violates our Fool's Rules, please report it via the Report this Comment Report this Comment icon found on every comment.

  • Report this Comment On July 15, 2010, at 3:23 PM, rbtrader wrote:

    Funny article. Apple just released the new software for the iPhone. It will address the nasty signal bar issue. I have a feeling Apple will continue to claim there is no reception or dropped call issue with their phone.

  • Report this Comment On July 15, 2010, at 4:00 PM, InfoThatHelp wrote:

    11) We have just been informed by people sighting Verizon engineers sabotaging AT&T network by hacking feverishly at AT&T cell towers with BlackBerrys !

  • Report this Comment On July 15, 2010, at 10:04 PM, InfoThatHelp wrote:

    I haven't met a single iPhone owner who's unhappy but all the BB fans are such mindless pests !!!

  • Report this Comment On July 16, 2010, at 8:31 AM, uanant wrote:

    funny its always been the case, if you can not raise to competitor level then hate him and bring him down to disgusting levels.

    another example, no one could play like Tiger woods so what they did, hate him and when he fell in personal life then smear mud all over. they are doing the same to apple.

    Don't forget apple is the one who revolutionized smartphone market and honestly there is no product out there that can perform as user friendly as apple. Get real folks stop criticizing, even the genius who wrote this article does have the brains to come up with an idea like apple.

  • Report this Comment On July 16, 2010, at 9:01 AM, catoismymotor wrote:

    I would try to stream the conference live but the antenna on my iphone keeps failing. :)

  • Report this Comment On July 16, 2010, at 12:18 PM, InfoThatHelp wrote:

    Even condoms need to be handled carefully and put on in certain ways. How many people neglected that and had babies?

  • Report this Comment On July 16, 2010, at 12:22 PM, InfoThatHelp wrote:

    Fools can put earbuds up their nostrils and file class action suits against the manufacturers for making people suffocate to death without hearing the music.

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