What to Do if You Regret Buying Your Home
KEY POINTS
- Given all the decisions you make in a single day, it's no surprise that you may regret a few.
- Being tied to a new home is a lot like getting married -- both are huge decisions with big consequences.
- It is possible to feel more at home by facing your issues with the home head on and making a plan to stay long enough to turn a profit when you sell.
It is estimated that a human makes up to 35,000 decisions each day. We must decide on everything, from whether we're skipping breakfast to which podcast we'll listen to on the way to work. And the sneaky thing is, some truly monumental decisions are hidden within all those tiny decisions.
As we decide whether we want to make an offer on a home, we're also deciding if it's cool enough outside to wear a coat and if we should feed the dogs before leaving the house. It's easy to make a decision we later regret. You have options if you're among the new homeowners who regret getting a mortgage and buying your current home.
Make a list
Having moved into a new home in the summer of 2022, I feel your pain regarding disappointment. My husband made the purchase while I was in another state selling our old home, so the first time I saw our new house was the evening I moved in. He purchased a home that was mechanically sound but quite unattractive.
Given that this wasn't my first rodeo, I knew the drill. I sat down and wrote out a "dream list." It included everything I wanted to do to change this house. I knew we couldn't do it all at once, but I felt better knowing I had a long-term plan.
If you look around your new home and wonder what in the world you've gotten yourself into, draw up a list of the things you'd like to change. Tackle one at a time as your checking account allows.
Treat your home as a business decision
You probably applied with a mortgage lender and bought a home, in part, because you thought it would be a good investment. And you got that right, but only if you dial back the emotion and treat the property as a business decision -- and that means not selling too soon.
Real estate experts say you should aim to stay in your house for at least five years before selling. On average, that's about how long it takes to make up for the closing costs and mortgage interest paid.
If you're a first-time buyer, it would be easy to believe that the value of your property will continue to increase as home prices have over the last few years. However, you can't count on that. The table below gives you an idea of the rate at which home prices increased before the pandemic and since the beginning of COVID-19 lockdowns.
| Year Over Year | Median National Home Price | Approximate Change |
|---|---|---|
| Q1 2015–Q1 2016 | $289,200–$299,800 | Up 3.5% |
| Q1 2016–Q1 2017 | $299,800–$313,100 | Up 4% |
| Q1 2017–Q1 2018 | $313,100–$331,800 | Up 5.5% |
| Q1 2018–Q1 2019 | $331,800–$313,000 | Down 5.5% |
| Q1 2019–Q1 2020 | $313,000–$329,000 | Up 5% |
| Q1 2020–Q1 2023 (during pandemic) | $329,000–$429,000 | Up 23% |
Since no one knows when home values are going to slow, you may want to err on the side of caution. If you decide to sell down the road, wait long enough to make a profit on your investment.
Fake it
Experiencing regret does not have to mean you're miserable. Build memories in your perfectly imperfect home by hosting family functions, inviting friends over for a game night, and spending time doing the things you enjoy. If you love being outdoors, plant a small garden. If you've always wanted to learn to play guitar, now's the time. In short, find activities that make you smile.
In a somewhat surprising study, Sanford research scientists found that even faking a smile makes us feel happier. The effect may not be enough to overcome depression or other medical issues, but it does lift our spirits.
Even if you're determined to sell the house as soon as possible, use this time to fill it with memories you can look back on fondly.
Know you're not alone
Having critical thinking skills sometimes leads to questioning your own decisions. If you're pretty sure you made a mistake, keep in mind how normal your reaction is. A RealEstateWitch.com survey found that of millennials who own a home, 82% report having at least one significant regret related to their home purchase.
The early-20th-century writer Katherine Mansfield called regret "an appalling waste of energy" because you can't build on it. However, that doesn't mean you'll never experience it. If a home purchase is your current regret, I suggest you take it on as a challenge. Make a list of what bothers you about the home, and then one by one, tackle those issues.
Our Research Expert
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