Here's How Not Having Kids Became the Most Affordable Life Choice

We're all familiar with the classic American Dream: Get married, buy the house, have kids, retire well. At least that used to be the dream for many. But if you've seen any recent headlines, you may be convinced that no one is having kids anymore. And unless you're very well off, it's not hard to understand why.

But this massive rift in affordability between those who have kids and those who don't hasn't always been quite so pronounced. In fact, there are still tax incentives offered by the government that are designed to favor families. So what changed?

Here's a quick breakdown.

The high(er) cost of living

It's expensive to exist, what with all the frivolous costs of food and shelter getting in the way -- and, unfortunately, as prices rise, it only gets that much harder. For example, a $100,000 salary in 2014 has the same purchasing power as about a $132,000 salary today, according to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. That's a significant difference that can shape whether you feel financially ready to have kids or not.

Plus, for those who opt not to have children, child care is one big cost they can avoid. Based on the latest available data, those prices range from $5,357 in 2022 dollars for school-age home-based care in small counties up to $17,171 for infant center-based care in very large counties. (And that's assuming you don't live in a child care desert, which would require you to stay home to care for your child, potentially impacting your ability to earn money.)

Stagnating incomes

General personal finance knowledge says that you can expect to earn more money over time. And while that's true, especially if you ask for raises, that doesn't mean that the bigger picture isn't all but frozen in place.

In fact, wages for most workers in the U.S. have essentially stagnated since the 1970s, despite a rise in productivity. Middle-wage workers' hourly pay is up 6% since 1979, and low-wage workers' earnings are actually down 5%. Meanwhile, those with very high wages saw a 41% increase, according to an analysis from the Economic Policy Institute. That's a significant spike in inequality that can make the question of whether you can afford to become a parent a difficult one.

That, combined with the ever-rising cost of living, means that the money you earn isn't going nearly as far as it used to. And that's assuming you're staying debt free.

The other reason people are opting for a childfree lifestyle

The decision to have kids is not just a financial one, it's also something that will shape the rest of your life. So it makes sense that more people are opting to wait or potentially choosing not to have kids. And as it becomes less affordable, and more common to opt out of parenthood, it also becomes more socially acceptable. And that can certainly feed into each other.

And while it's doubtful that anyone is seriously making the decision to have kids based on the desire to not have to answer uncomfortable questions at family reunions, the social component is certainly there. And there is something to be said for the cultural shift that's happened in recent years regarding the "acceptability" of being childfree, enabling more people to make that decision more freely.

Ultimately, having kids is one of those very personal decisions that can't be made based on your bank account balance alone. Either way, it is an important decision to make to craft a life you love.