OK, Starbucks (Nasdaq: SBUX) doesn't really hate America, but its ardor for U.S. expansion has cooled. (Can you blame it? U.S. customers' enthusiasm for Starbucks has grown equally tepid.) The coffee giant plans to slow down its expansion here while it accelerates store openings overseas -- both notable but not surprising moves.

Sorry, folks -- The Onion's dreams of a Starbucks-within-a-Starbucks appear to be over in a venti way.

Starbucks' quarterly net income fell 28% as U.S. consumers felt increasingly pinched by the weakening economy. The coffee giant had already warned us that this quarter wasn't going to be fun. As far as new news goes, there's that whole "Let's get groovy, have a smoothie" drink option, which makes good breakfast conversation. But smoothies seem less than promising in smoothing things over, and they're a little out of place amid returning CEO Howard Schultz's otherwise coffee-centric focus.

Check back at Fool.com a little later today, when I'll have caffeinated a bit more in preparation for a closer look at Starbucks' quarter.

News to go
In more love/hate relationship news, Microsoft's (Nasdaq: MSFT) board of directors apparently met late last night to talk about Yahoo! (Nasdaq: YHOO) behind its back. Not surprisingly, Microsoft appears to be mulling whether to raise the bid (reports suggest $33 per share) or just say, "Never mind -- I didn't like you that much, anyway." Oh, to be a fly on that wall! So far, there's no news about what actually transpired. Maybe they're playing "I love you, I love you not."

Meanwhile, The Wall Street Journal has reported new details in the brewing legal battle between eBay (Nasdaq: EBAY) and touchy-feely online classifieds site Craigslist. Apparently, the smaller site repeatedly spurned eBay's past acquisitive overtures. Over the years, all signs have pointed to Craigslist as a lover, not a fighter, but it turns out that the company doesn't mind busting out a little tae kwon do to protect itself.

Craigslist's efforts to dilute eBay's stake in it do indeed seem like fightin' moves. Silicon Alley Insider reported that Craigslist's response to eBay's legal complaint was not only couched in terms of protecting its online community but also took a few swipes at an "uncomfortably conflicted shareholder" who's "obsessed" with profits. Craigslist's management has always made it perfectly clear that it doesn't have any big money-making obsession, and Craig himself hasn't seemed interested in selling out.

As expected, the Federal Reserve cut rates by a quarter-point yesterday afternoon -- and hinted at an end to the rate-cutting. The economy did show growth in the preliminary gross domestic product number, but it was pretty anemic. Do the ivory-tower assurances of some academic types that this may not be a recession, or at least not a bad one, hold much water? High food and gas prices, the housing market crash, and the continued decline in jobs are worrisome, and they're unquestionably hurting average citizens. No wonder some Fools are glad that Ben Bernanke may finally be done. Today's economic news agenda includes more color on jobless claims and personal income and spending in March.

Not everybody's hurting, though. Oil giant ExxonMobil (NYSE: XOM) will report earnings today, and analysts are expecting another record quarter. Surprised? I didn't think so.

Thanks for joining me for breakfast. I hope you have a great and Foolish day!

Microsoft and Starbucks are Motley Fool Inside Value recommendations. Starbucks and eBay are Motley Fool Stock Advisor picks. Try any of our Foolish newsletter services free for 30 days.

Alyce Lomax owns shares of Starbucks, and so does The Motley Fool. The Fool's disclosure policy dreams of recursive coffee shops.