For my husband and me, planning for our eventual retirement has not been easy. Every time we took a step forward, something would smack us in the face. Whether it was a job loss, a brain tumor, or the Great Recession, there was always some giant boulder in the middle of the road blocking our way.

In between crises, we saved and invested as if it were our sole job on Earth. We learned to live below our means (and find satisfaction in it) and maxed out our 401(k)s. Part of the plan became to wait until 70 to claim Social Security and maximize our benefits.

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The eye-opening effect of loss

This past year has been eye-opening, and as keeper of the budget, I've decided that waiting until 70 to claim Social Security isn't always the best answer.

Here's what initially had me stuck: Social Security benefits increase by 8% for each year they're not claimed between full retirement age (FRA) and 70. That means our checks would be 24% higher at age 70 (8% x three years = 24%). I recognize that that's a lot of money to leave on the table. However, few things in life are free, and I'm no longer sure I'm willing to pay the price for larger checks. It wasn't a financial seminar, podcast, or friend's advice that changed my mind. It was a series of small realizations. For example:

• We've begun losing friends. I used to believe that once I reached a certain age, I wouldn't be so shocked when a friend died. However, when I hear the name Andrea, I see my friend as she was at 15 or 16. When I hear the name Terri, I still think of her as 40. That's how old they were when I knew them, and that's how they're frozen in my mind. Yet both are gone with little warning, reminding me that none of us knows how long we have.
• I wanted things my way. About a year ago, I looked at my husband and knew he wasn't happy. After a career filled with travel and excitement, he'd taken a simpler position that was supposed to carry him through to retirement. The part of him that loves a challenge stopped being fed, and he seemed miserable. Worse, I knew he was sticking with that job due to my desire to build an ever-larger retirement fund.

One night, I asked my husband what he would do with his days if he had the chance. He said he'd like to become a consultant, putting all those manufacturing skills he's learned over the years to good use.

I shouldn't have been surprised by his response. He's always loved putting out fires. The problem is, he'd have to give up a salaried job, start his own small business, and rely on companies to hire him. The idea made me nervous.

Taking a chance

There's a quote from Henry David Thoreau in my office. It reads: "The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it." How much of our lives was I trading for a larger retirement account?

After much consideration, the plan now is to claim Social Security at 67 instead of 70. We'll receive smaller Social Security benefits, but spend our days doing what we want. While I plan to continue writing, I'll have more time to help him with his new small business when he needs me.

This afternoon, for the first time in a while, I heard a spark of enthusiasm in my husband's voice and couldn't help but feel a tiny frisson of excitement myself. None of us knows how long we have on this planet. I would rather we really live than keep muddling through for larger checks.